Girls 5.05: Queen For Two Days

Hel continues working through the latest season of Girls.

You are way too luscious to be with the wrong guy.

Given Tad’s glorious episode earlier in the season, it seems only right that Mother Horvath gets one this week. Loreen and Hannah head for a rejuvenating weekend away for a spot of Spring Queening with a group of women named Kathy, Cathy, Barb and Coco; divorcees, singletons, men cynics and food enthusiasts. Hannah is bored, no telephones allowed and the female bonding is a little much, plus, she hates ‘outside’ as we all know. In fact, she hates the whole retreat – I have to agree – blind-folded rambling, trust exercises and alone time while being told to “lead with your c*nt” is not my idea of relaxation but she does gets to spend time with her mum and better yet, she gets away from Fran who is way too nice. Climbing into bed that first night, she assures her mother, “you didn’t fuck me up.

Shosh is still in Japan and working in a cat café, her language is improving and she appears to have the lay of the land and is enjoying a romantic exploration with the lovely, if virtuous, Yoshi. Abigail arrives in Japan to “save” Shoshanna, which in itself is pretty amazing given Abigail’s phobia of, well, anywhere that isn’t America – Shosh shows her sights and introduces her to the culture and cuisine. Things seem to be going well until Abigail declares the new couple adorable and they should have their own reality TV show called Yosh & Shosh “he looks like an Asiatic One Direction member.” All the positivity comes to a crashing halt when Shoshanna breaks down and admits that if she hears one more person say thank you, “I’m going to fucking cut somebody!”

Adam and Jessa are no longer having obdurate sexy time (it’s Hannah’s turn this week) as we cut to them mid-coitus. They’re both very much into role-playing with some hilarious results. Jessa’s half-sister Minerva (Marianna Palka) is in town and wants to meet her for dinner; Adam immediately offers to accompany her. They are, however many misgivings they (and I) had, very sweet together and he seems committed; sending text messages (okay, illiterate ones) and generally being supportive. All the things he did for eventually did for Hannah but this seems like a potential sticker. Minerva is Amazonian in stature and Adam is immediately intimidated, especially once Jessa tells him that they have shared most, if not all, sexual partners (including Jessa’s father). Jessa uses the dinner to ask for a loan – her tuition is expensive and her stint in rehab means Grandma cut her off. Minnie declines, refusing to fund her sister’s latest whim leaving the compassionate boyfriend to swoop in and save the day.

Back at the retreat, Hannah is following her mother on a trail wearing a bright red cut-away swimsuit and uses the opportunity to FaceTime her father who is at home awaiting Loreen’s decision re: the divorce. It’s as if she regresses and acts like a sullen child throughout the stay until the Yoga instructor (played by Lena Hall) throws her a luscious compliment and after we cut to a brilliant dance routine, Hannah ends up going down on said bendy woman in the sauna room. Until things get too hot and I mean LITERALLY as Hannah struggles to breathe amid the steam and pulls away leaving the instructor to finish herself off, only to climax and then start weeping. Oof…awkward.

With themes of sisterhood, loss and struggle to find a happy place in the world, within relationships and themselves, you know the usual, Queen for Two Days is wonderful. This season is well on its way to being the best yet. It is beautifully shot as the action flits between the city, upstate New York and Japan, Tami Sagher providing the words and Jesse Peretz the direction. It shows multiple, credible women outside of the Girls quartet (although, no Marnie), working through their crap and ends as it began with Hannah and Loreen, who has been made to realise that a gay husband is not the end of the world. “I know it sounds sad to you, but I like our house and your father’s very nice…He plays Scrabble really well. These things count for a lot.
To which her daughter adds, “I think you guys really did fuck me up.”

All Hands On Deck by Tinashe ℗2014 RCA Records/Sony Music
Life On Mars by Aurora ℗2016 Interscope Records

Hel Harding-Jones

Updated: Apr 05, 2016

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